Mama Quotes

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Yo Mama’s so ugly, her Mama had to tie a steak around her neck to get the dogs to play with her.

Oliver Oliver Reed
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Yo Mama’s so ugly, her Mama had to tie a steak around her neck to get the dogs to play with her.

Oliver Oliver Reed, 155 World's Funniest YO MAMA Jokes
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Yo Mama’s so old, her memory is in black and white.

Oliver Oliver Reed, 155 World's Funniest YO MAMA Jokes
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Yo Mama’s so ugly, her dentist treats her by mail order.

Oliver Oliver Reed, 155 World's Funniest YO MAMA Jokes
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Yo Mama’s so ugly that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn't have to kiss her goodbye.

Oliver Oliver Reed, 155 World's Funniest YO MAMA Jokes
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Yo Mama’s so ugly, when she joined an ugly contest, they said, “Sorry, no professionals.

Oliver Oliver Reed, 155 World's Funniest YO MAMA Jokes
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Yo Mama’s so poor, when I lit her house on fire, the cockroaches came out singing, “Clap your hands, stomp your feet, praise the Lord, we got some heat!

Oliver Oliver Reed, 155 World's Funniest YO MAMA Jokes
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We women, me and you. Tell me something real. Don’t just say I’m grown and ought to know. I don’t. I’m fifty and I don’t know nothing. What about it? Do I stay with him? I want to, I think. I want… well, I didn’t always… now I want. I want some fat in this life.”“Wake up. Fat or lean, you got just one. This is it.”“You don’t know either, do you?”“I know enough to know how to behave.”“Is that it? Is that all it is?”“Is that all what is?”“Oh shoot! Where the grown people? Is it us?”“Oh, Mama.” Alice Manfred blurted it out and then covered her mouth. Violet had the same thought: Mama. Mama? Is this where you got to and couldn’t do it no more? The place of shade without trees where you know you are not and never again will be loved by anybody who can choose to do it? Where everything is over but the talking? - Violet Trace and Alice Manfred

Toni Morrison, Jazz
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Mama, Mama, help me get homeI'm out in the woods, I am out on my own.I found me a werewolf, a nasty old muttIt showed me its teeth and went straight for my gut.Mama, Mama, help me get homeI'm out in the woods, I am out on my own.I was stopped by a vampire, a rotting old wreckIt showed me its teeth and went straight for my neck.Mama, Mama, put me to bedI won't make it home, I'm already half-dead.I met an Invalid, and fell for his artHe showed me his smile, and went straight for my heart.-From "A Child's Walk Home," Nursery Rhymes and Folk Tales

Lauren Oliver, Delirium
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Emily: Oh, Mama, look at me one minute as though you really saw me. Mama, fourteen years have gone by. I'm dead. You're a grandmother, Mama! Wally's dead, too. His appendix burst on a camping trip to North Conway. We felt just terrible about it - don't you remember? But, just for a moment now we're all together. Mama, just for a moment we're happy. Let's really look at one another!...I can't. I can't go on.It goes so fast. We don't have time to look at one another. I didn't realize. So all that was going on and we never noticed. Take me back -- up the hill -- to my grave. But first: Wait! One more look. Good-bye , Good-bye world. Good-bye, Grover's Corners....Mama and Papa. Good-bye to clocks ticking....and Mama's sunflowers. And food and coffee. And new ironed dresses and hot baths....and sleeping and waking up. Oh, earth,you are too wonderful for anybody to realize you. Do any human beings ever realize life while they live it--every,every minute?Stage Manager: No. (pause) The saints and poets, maybe they do some.Emily: I'm ready to go back.

Thornton Wilder, Our Town
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I stood there, staring at my clothes. What does a mama wear to her son’s funeral? I looked over my wardrobe.There were outfits purchased for work, church, and casual weekends but nothing to wear to the burial of my seventeen-year-old son.

Shelley Ramsey, Grief: A Mama's Unwanted Journey
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