Fred Armisen Quotes

“I'm so glad cities have personalities, just like people have personalities. That's something that makes me smile.”

“My father came from Germany. My mom came from Venezuela. My father's culturally German, but his father was Japanese. I was raised in New York and spent two years in Rio. My parents met at the University of Southern Mississippi, and they had me there, and then we moved to New York. I'm not very familiar with Mississippi.”

“Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs,” sighed George, patting the heading of the map. “We owe them so much.”“Noble men, working tirelessly to help a new generation of lawbreakers,” said Fred solemnly.“Right,” said George briskly. “Don’t forget to wipe it after you’ve used it —”“— or anyone can read it,” Fred said warningly.[Prisoner of Azkaban, Chapter 10]”

“You’re mental,” said George, trying to push it back at Harry.“No, I’m not,” said Harry. “You take it, and get inventing. It’s for the joke shop.”“He is mental,” Fred said in an almost awed voice. [Goblet of Fire]”

“Well, you can't break an Unbreakable Vow....""I'd worked that much out for myself, funnily enough. What happens if you break it, then?""You die," said Ron simply. "Fred and George tried to get me to make one when I was about five. I nearly did too, I was holding hands with Fred and everything when Dad found us. He went mental," said Ron, with a reminiscent gleam in his eyes. "Only time I've ever seen Dad as angry as Mum. Fred reckons his left buttock has never been the same since."“Yeah, well, passing over Fred’s left buttock —”"I beg your pardon?" said Fred's voice as the twins entered the kitchen.”

“I'm glad you escaped, Kyra," Fred said, looking serious again. "And that I found you.""Me too," Kyra said, glancing up at him. "It wouldn't have been much of a life trying to live in the dumbwaiter."Fred leaned down and kissed Kyra full on the lips.Kyra pulled away. "How do you know I'm interested in you? Just because you've decided I'm worth hanging around for doesn't mean I feel the same way."Fred cocked his head at her. "Really?""Oh, okay," Kyra said.Then she kissed him back.”

“Fred and George exchanged looks."You don't mind if we don't kiss you, do you, Ron?" said Fred in a falsely anxious voice. "We could curtsy, if you like," said George. "Oh, shut up," said Ron, scowling at them.”

“Arthur and Fred—” “I’m George,” said the twin at whom Moody was pointing. “Can’t you even tell us apart when we’re Harry?” “Sorry, George—” “I’m only yanking your wand, I’m Fred really—”

“Okay, that one's pretty good," Fred acknowledged, after she'd told him a particularly filthy joke. "But have you heard the one about the baker's wife?""No," Kyra said."Rumor has it, she married him for his buns." Fred burst out laughing.Kyra groaned. "Okay, that was just bad.”

“Hey, look — Harry’s got a Weasley sweater, too!”Fred and George were wearing blue sweaters, one with a large yellow F on it, the other a G.“Harry’s is better than ours, though,” said Fred, holding up Harry’s sweater. “She obviously makes more of an effort if you’re not family.”