“Close your eyes, and think of someone you physically admire, and let me kiss you.”

“The paradox is that I have no love for myself as a human being, but I have immense pride in the music I make, and I believe it has an important place. Others do, too, and the thousands of people with Morrissey tattoos certainly proves something.”

“I hated the royal wedding.”

“Any criticism of Thatcher throws a dangerously absurd light on the entire machinery of British politics. Thatcher's name must be protected, not because of all the wrong that she had done, but because the people around her allowed her to do it.”

“I don't want to go on much longer, really. I think that would suggest a lack of imagination. A certain lack of dignity also.”

“I am unable to watch the Olympics due to the blustering jingoism that drenches the event. Has England ever been quite so foul with patriotism? The 'dazzling royals' have, quite naturally, hi-jacked the Olympics for their own empirical needs, and no oppositional voice is allowed in the free press.”

“If you travel to Germany, it's still absolutely Germany. If you travel to Sweden, it still has a Swedish identity.”

“What's the first thing I do when I wake up in the morning? Wish I hadn't.”

“Age shouldn't affect you. It's just like the size of your shoes - they don't determine how you live your life! You're either marvellous or you're boring, regardless of your age.”

“I mean, death is a serious thing, certainly not to be sneezed at.”

“Long hair is an unpardonable offence which should be punishable by death.”