“I'm thirty years old, but I read at the thirty-four-year-old level.”

“I know it's a cliche, but the whole family is just whacked. I mean, we're all out of our minds. They're the funniest, most eccentric bizarre people I've ever met, my siblings.”

“I grew up middle class - my dad was a high school teacher; there were five kids in our family. We all shared a nine-hundred-square-foot home with one bathroom. That was exciting. And my wife is Irish Catholic and also very, very barely middle class.”

“I have a theory that if you're famous more years than you're not famous, then you get a little nutty.”

“I'm thirty years old, but I read at the thirty-four-year-old level.”