(Remember you always have the option of taking to the sea.)

(Remember you always have the option of taking to the sea.)

Mallory Ortberg
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Ghost! I miss him! Is that weird? I miss him even though I invented him. I feel a lot of tenderness toward him. I don't write a lot of stuff that is sad or that is tender and affectionate, so that has a very special place in my heart.

Mallory Ortberg
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I have a lot of faith in the power of joking to make something thoughtful.

Mallory Ortberg
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My history teacher could make us feel like he was imparting rare gossip to us when he was talking about Maria Theresa and the Habsburgs. I just loved that sense of - the Western canon is here, and it's gossipy and tawdry, and everyone is sort of goofy.

Mallory Ortberg
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I attended an evangelical Christian university on the outskirts of suburban Los Angeles and by the time of my graduation was neither evangelical nor Christian.

Mallory Ortberg
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Humor is always more interesting when it comes from someone who's had more than, like, five experiences.

Mallory Ortberg
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(Remember you always have the option of taking to the sea.)

Mallory Ortberg
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