“Rice is great if you're really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something.”
“Rice is great if you're really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something.”
Mitch Hedberg
“I know a lot about cars, man. I can look at any car's headlights and tell you exactly which way it's coming.”
Mitch Hedberg“I don't have a girlfriend. But I do know a woman who'd be mad at me for saying that.”
Mitch Hedberg“I drank some boiling water because I wanted to whistle.”
Mitch Hedberg“All these jokes have been pre-approved as funny by me.”
Mitch Hedberg“My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.”
Mitch Hedberg“I wear a necklace, cause I wanna know when I'm upside down.”
Mitch Hedberg“I wanted to buy a candle holder, but the store didn't have one. So I got a cake.”
Mitch Hedberg“Rice is great if you're really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something.”
Mitch Hedberg“Why is Cloud 9 so amazing? What is wrong with Cloud 8? That joke came off the top of my head, and the top of my head ain't funny!”
Mitch Hedberg“A waffle is like a pancake with a syrup trap.”
Mitch HedbergAll in One Creative & Marketing Platform to tell stories at scale
