“Some people say funny things, but I say things funny.”

“When you stand alone and sell yourself, you can't please everyone. But when you're different, you can last.”

“I have to have energy because I have a lot of expenses. A couple of cars, couple of dogs and a big estate.”

“Who picks your clothes - Stevie Wonder?”

“Some people say funny things, but I say things funny.”

“The old days were the old days. And they were great days. But now is now.”

“You got to have a lot of courage. Secondly, whatever it is you're doing, you have to believe in it wholeheartedly. Thirdly, you have to be able to stand up in front of people and know that they'll laugh.”

“To my knowledge, I was the first guy really to do what I do. And then later on different comedians started trying doing it.”

“To me, the stand up part in my life is great. I know I can do that. When I get an acting chance, I'm really thrilled.”

“I stopped smoking. But my personality I still have. I get up in the morning, and not everybody loves me, so if you want to call that a bad habit, there's that.”

“I like to think I'm like the guy who goes to the office Christmas party Friday night, insults some people, but still has his job Monday morning.”