“The traffic warden looked up. "This your car?" "It is," said Skulduggery. The traffic warden nodded. "Very nice, very nice. But you can't park here, day or night." "I wasn't aware of that." "There's a sign right over there." "I didn't think it applied to me." "Why wouldn't it have applied to you?" Skulduggery tilted his head. "Because I'm special." "Don't care how special you think you are, you're parked in a no parking area and as such you're---" "We're here on official police business." The traffic warden narrowed his eyes. "You're Garda? I'm going to need to see some identification." "We're undercover," said Skulduggery. "This is a very important undercover operation which you are endangering just by talking to us." He opened his jacket. "Look, I have a gun. I am Detective Inspector Me. This is my partner, Detective Her." The traffic warden frowned. "Her?" "Me," said Stephanie. "Him?" "Not me," said Skulduggery. "Her." "Me," said Stephanie. "You?" said the traffic warden. "Yes," said Stephanie. "I"m sorry, who are you?" Stephanie looked at him. "I'm Her, he's Me. Got it? Good. You better get out of here before you blow our cover. They've got snipers.”
Derek Landy“When I meet people, I no longer say "Hi, I'm Derek Landy, pleased to meet you." Now I say "Hi, I'm number one bestselling author Derek Landy. Worship me.”
Derek Landy“Kindness suits you.""Really? I think I'm quite allergic to it.”
Derek Landy“Valkyrie smiled patiently. "I like how you do your make-up. Do you use a brush, or just dip your head in the bucket?”
Derek Landy“I wasn't always who I am now. No one ever is. I've spent my entire lifetime becoming who I am. Finally, I'm here and I'm old. It's depressing, it really is.”
Derek Landy, Dark Days“It would be fun,” Skulduggery nodded. ”I like kicking Wreath in the face. I haven't had a chance to do it nearly as much as I'd like.”
Derek Landy, Death Bringer“What about you?" he asked, his words not much more than a mumble. "Regrets?""Many," Skuduggery said.Tesseract's breath rattled in his chest. "That's the goo thing about living. You get to make up for past mistakes.""Or make brand-new ones.”
Derek Landy, Mortal Coil“It's not that I want you to go, it's just that I don't want you to stay." - China Sorrows -”
Derek Landy, Mortal Coil“They say sarcasm is the lowest form of wit," Valkyrie said. China glanced at her. "They've obviously never met me.”
Derek Landy, Mortal Coil“Peace means nothing without freedom.”
Derek Landy, Kingdom of the Wicked“Stairs," Valkyrie said, disappointed."Not just ordinary stairs," Skulduggery told her as he led the way down. "Magic stairs.""Really?""Oh, yes."She followed him into the darkness. "How are they magic?""They just are.""In what way?""In a magicky way."She glared at the back of his head. "They aren't magic at all, are they?""Not really.”
Derek Landy, Mortal Coil