Telly Quotes

“I was born with a romantic nature, and I'll carry it to my grave.”

“Before you go,mate,turn on the telly. Something raunchy too. Think I'll rub off one before I go to sleep”

“This is no time for drinking a mug of water - which you would do nowhere else in the world. A mug of water! You just don't drink water from mugs, do ya? Except on the telly. Water out of a mug! Should be a hot drink... mug of water.”

“At twenty life was like wrestling an octopus. Every moment mattered. At thirty it was a walk in the country. Most of the time your mind was somewhere else. By the time you got to seventy, it was probably like watching snooker on the telly.”

“Charity knew that she had to be up early in the morning. And she knew that a weepy, silly, ridiculously old-fashioned love story was not the thing to watch with a broken heart. Nevertheless, she watched. And wept. And was still smiling when she fell asleep at three o'clock in the morning, with the remote in her hand and the telly still going.”

“You know what you need?”“What?”“You need to think about what a badass bald man would do in this situation”“There are no badass bald men. By definition.”“What about Dwight D. Eisenhower?” Carlos suggested.“President Eisenhower?”“Doesn’t he qualify as a badass?” Carlos insisted.“Look, he may have been president, but he doesn’t exactly come to people’s minds when you ask them to think of a badass.”“All right. How about Kojak?” Carlos asked.“That police detective show with Telly Savalas?” Sammy asked.“Yeah, Kojak. He was a badass. Always cool under pressure.”“All right,” Sammy replied. “Let’s just say, for the sake of argument, that Kojak was a bald badass. So what?’“So you have to imagine how Kojak would deal with this situation we have in front of us. He wouldn’t be worried about whether this girl digs bald guys. He would just walk right up to her, knowing that he’s a badass and just take care of business. You see, it’s all in the delivery.”“The delivery?”“Yeah, the execution”

“You are more likely to find three TVs inside a randomly selected house than you are to find a single book that is or was not read to pass an exam, to please God, or to be a better cook.”