“You know what you need?”“What?”“You need to think about what a badass bald man would do in this situation”“There are no badass bald men. By definition.”“What about Dwight D. Eisenhower?” Carlos suggested.“President Eisenhower?”“Doesn’t he qualify as a badass?” Carlos insisted.“Look, he may have been president, but he doesn’t exactly come to people’s minds when you ask them to think of a badass.”“All right. How about Kojak?” Carlos asked.“That police detective show with Telly Savalas?” Sammy asked.“Yeah, Kojak. He was a badass. Always cool under pressure.”“All right,” Sammy replied. “Let’s just say, for the sake of argument, that Kojak was a bald badass. So what?’“So you have to imagine how Kojak would deal with this situation we have in front of us. He wouldn’t be worried about whether this girl digs bald guys. He would just walk right up to her, knowing that he’s a badass and just take care of business. You see, it’s all in the delivery.”“The delivery?”“Yeah, the execution”

“You know what you need?”“What?”“You need to think about what a badass bald man would do in this situation”“There are no badass bald men. By definition.”“What about Dwight D. Eisenhower?” Carlos suggested.“President Eisenhower?”“Doesn’t he qualify as a badass?” Carlos insisted.“Look, he may have been president, but he doesn’t exactly come to people’s minds when you ask them to think of a badass.”“All right. How about Kojak?” Carlos asked.“That police detective show with Telly Savalas?” Sammy asked.“Yeah, Kojak. He was a badass. Always cool under pressure.”“All right,” Sammy replied. “Let’s just say, for the sake of argument, that Kojak was a bald badass. So what?’“So you have to imagine how Kojak would deal with this situation we have in front of us. He wouldn’t be worried about whether this girl digs bald guys. He would just walk right up to her, knowing that he’s a badass and just take care of business. You see, it’s all in the delivery.”“The delivery?”“Yeah, the execution”

“My decision to become a teacher suddenly seemed even more appropriate. Life had just become that much more unpredictably precarious and ill-suited to long-term planning, and it felt that much more necessary to spread love and knowledge to those who would one day have to manage this messy and painful world of ours"Also in Zack Love's "Stories and Scripts: an Anthology”

“We pick the people who populate our personal lives as much for who they make us as for who they are. I chose Anna for the person I became in her presence, and in this respect, my love for her was a more selfish one”

“At times like these, size really does matter," I point out, at I extend my ginormous umbrella over her in a way that stops any rain droplets from falling on her.My Best Valentine's Day Ever, A Short Story by Zack Love”

“I wish I knew how to get you back. And apparently fate won't let me give up"From Central Park Song: a Screenplay”

“So I'm delighted to open up a bit about these particular details, in honor of Valentine's Day (when every balding, chubby, and short actuary wants people - especially the babes out there - to know about his studly past"From: "My Best Valentine's Day.Ever: a Short Story”

“It will all work out, Inas. You come from a long line of survivors and strong women. So everything will be fine in the end. And we are always with you in spirit, to guide you and love you.”

“Summoning my inner Kojak, I tried to convince myself that she would have sat next to me even had there been somewhere else on the bus to sit. Unfortunately, I didn't do a very good job of self-persuasion. Good thing I wasn't in court suing myself, because I would have lost. From: "My Best Valentine's Day.Ever: A Short Story”

“Indeed, wounded loved can make for fierce vengeance. And, from what I know of Anissa, it does seem a bit out of character for her to behave so spitefully, so I'd like to think that she really is just deeply hurt, angry and looking for some way to injure me back...I hope she knows how well she's succeeded.”

“And today is really the happiest day of your life, because today you woke up and stumbled across the shadow of your soul in broad daylight."From Central Park Song: a Screenplay”

“Well why don't you lean over this counter a little more and give me your best kiss, and then I'll tell you if I want you to take me out to dinner.”