“When compelled to cook I produce a meal that would make a sword swallower gag.”
Russell Baker“Usually, terrible things that are done with the excuse that progress requires them are not really progress at all, but just terrible things.”
Russell Baker“Anticipating that most poetry will be worse than carrying heavy luggage through O'Hare Airport, the public, to its loss, reads very little of it.”
Russell Baker“Poetry is so vital to us until school spoils it.”
Russell Baker“I gave up on new poetry myself 30 years ago when most of it began to read like coded messages passing between lonely aliens in a hostile world.”
Russell Baker“You can always tell folks from nonfolks. Folks like to feel good, like to smile for the camera when there's a big photo opportunity for a really good cause.”
Russell Baker“When it comes to cars, only two varieties of people are possible - cowards and fools.”
Russell Baker“An educated person is one who has learned that information almost always turns out to be at best incomplete and very often false, misleading, fictitious, mendacious - just dead wrong.”
Russell Baker“Reporters thrive on the world's misfortune. For this reason they often take an indecent pleasure in events that dismay the rest of humanity.”
Russell Baker“There is a growing literature about the multitude of journalism's problems, but most of it is concerned with the editorial side of the business, possibly because most people competent to write about journalism are not comfortable writing about finance.”
Russell Baker“Listen once in a while. It's amazing what you can hear.”
Russell Baker