“A humorist is a man who feels bad but who feels good about it.”

“There's one thing about baldness, it's neat.”

“It takes a lot of things to prove you are smart, but only one thing to prove you are ignorant.”

“There is nobody so irritating as somebody with less intelligence and more sense than we have.”

“A humorist is a person who feels bad, but who feels good about it.”

“Unhappiness is not knowing what we want and killing ourselves to get it.”

“There's one thing about baldness - it's neat.”

“A humorist is a man who feels bad but who feels good about it.”

“Unhappiness is in not knowing what we want and killing ourselves to get it.”

“The brighter you are, the more you have to learn.”

“Work is the greatest thing in the world. So we should save some of it for tomorrow.”