“Anything awful makes me laugh. I misbehaved once at a funeral.”

“Tis the privilege of friendship to talk nonsense, and to have her nonsense respected.”

“Cultivate simplicity or rather should I say banish elaborateness, for simplicity springs spontaneous from the heart.”

“He is no lawyer who cannot take two sides.”

“Lawyers, I suppose, were children once.”

“Tis the privilege of friendship to talk nonsense, and have her nonsense respected.”

“The most common error made in matters of appearance is the belief that one should disdain the superficial and let the true beauty of one's soul shine through. If there are places on your body where this is a possibility, you are not attractive - you are leaking.”

“New Year's Day is every man's birthday.”

“The human species, according to the best theory I can form of it, is composed of two distinct races, the men who borrow and the men who lend.”

“Nothing puzzles me more than the time and space and yet nothing troubles me less.”

“For thy sake tobacco I Would do anything but die.”