Children need to trust and depend upon those who are responsible for them.

Children need to trust and depend upon those who are responsible for them.

Gordon Neufeld
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It is a parent's responsibility to preserve the connection with their children, to preserve the relationship, so that the children can let go and become their own selves.

Gordon Neufeld
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Children need to trust and depend upon those who are responsible for them.

Gordon Neufeld
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Digital intimacy ruins the appetite for the real thing. So, when kids are gaming or even when spouses are gaming, they lose their appetite for genuine intimacy. Kids lose their appetite for getting their intimacy needs, their hunger for significance and attachment, with the family, and it erodes the relationship between them and their parents.

Gordon Neufeld
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Many people think that discipline is the essence of parenting. But that isn't parenting. Parenting is not telling your child what to do when he or she misbehaves. Parenting is providing the conditions in which a child can realize his or her full human potential.

Gordon Neufeld
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Unconditional parental love is the indespensible nutrient for the child's healthy emotional growth. The first task is to create space in the child's heart for the certainty that she is precisely the person the parents want and love. She does not have to do anything or be any different to earn that love - in fact, she cannot do anything, since that love cannot be won or lost...The child can be ornery, unpleasant, whiny, uncooperative, and plain rude, and the parent still lets her feel loved. Ways have to be found to convey the unacceptability of certain behaviors without making the child herself feel unaccepted. She has to be able to bring her unrest, her least likable characteristics to the parent and still receive the parent's absolutely satisfying, security-inducing unconditional love.

Gordon Neufeld
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Children learn best when they like their teacher and they think their teacher likes them.

Gordon Neufeld, Hold On to Your Kids: Why Parents Need to Matter More Than Peers
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Children do not experience our intentions, no matter how heartfelt. They experience what we manifest in tone and behavior.

Gordon Neufeld, Hold On to Your Kids: Why Parents Need to Matter More Than Peers
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