“Hell, I never vote for anybody, I always vote against.”

“I never worry about being driven to drink I just worry about being driven home. ”

“If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There's no point in being a damn fool about it.”

“It's morally wrong to allow a sucker to keep his money.”

“A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.”

“Hell, I never vote for anybody, I always vote against.”

“I like children - fried.”

“Sleep - the most beautiful experience in life - except drink.”

“The clever cat eats cheese and breathes down rat holes with baited breath.”

“I never worry about being driven to drink I just worry about being driven home.”

“Set up another case bartender! The best thing for a case of nerves is a case of Scotch.”