Laughter is an instant vacation.

Laughter is an instant vacation.

Milton Berle
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There's a difference between being a comic and a comedian. A comic is a guy who says funny things, and a comedian is a guy who says things funny, and he has a style and point of view that will last much longer.

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You can lead a man to Congress, but you can't make him think.

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A committee is a group that keeps minutes and loses hours.

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We owe a lot to Thomas Edison - if it wasn't for him, we'd be watching television by candlelight.

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Experience is what you have after you've forgotten her name.

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Laughter is an instant vacation.

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If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door.

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I'd like to tell you some jokes now but you'd only laugh.

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Committee: A group of men who keep minutes and waste hours.

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If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?

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